Perfect on Paper by Gillian Harvey (top 20 books to read txt) 📕

been forced to stand in front of the whole primary school and play Frère Jacques in unison. She’d managed to get through it, but still remembered the humiliation of having to screech out the notes under the judging gaze of her peers.

‘Hey, you! Great playing,’ a year six boy had said to her afterwards in the playground, playing an imaginary ‘air recorder’ and laughing.

She’d managed to avoid getting on stage through the rest of primary school. But in secondary, she had joined a drama club simply because two of her friends had, and it was that or spend lunch hours sitting in the classroom on her own. She’d enjoyed it for the most part, but had accidentally thrown herself into some of the improvs with too much gusto and ended up being awarded one of the main parts in the Christmas panto.

It hadn’t been a great performance but judging by the fact she’d got called ‘Cinders’ for the next four years, it had certainly been memorable.

Now she was here – about to rap live to the nation. But although the nerves coursed through her body, she realised she was kind of looking forward to it, too. It was a peculiar kind of excitement – the kind of excitement that comes with actually wanting something and being afraid that it might be taken away.

Her legs still ached from their almost continuous rehearsals. ‘Are you all right?’ Dan had asked earlier, worriedly. ‘You’re not limping are you?’

‘No,’ she’d lied. ‘It’s fine.’

She hoped it would be. She’d been working on her flexibility – she’d wanted to leave one particular move she’d planned a secret even from Eezee Troupe. Just in case it went wrong.

Dan had looked concerned but had agreed to the mystery part of the performance.

Clare now stood there, using her notes and keeping her voice quiet. ‘I’m preserving it,’ she told the concerned producer. ‘Don’t want to get hoarse.’

One of the runners appeared now at her side. ‘Everything OK?’ he asked. ‘Psyched for the performance?’

‘Yes, thank you,’ she lied.

In truth, she was even more nervous now than she’d been last time. Knowing that Toby and Katie were here, and that even Hatty had come along, made it all the more nerve-wracking. Even now, she could see them on screen looming large in the front row. Hatty was wearing a T-shirt that said ‘Team Martha’, with ‘#MehToo’ writ large on her forehead with eyeliner.

Dan had started talking about a release on iTunes, and about a producer who kept calling. She had no idea what the future might hold. All she could do was concentrate on the next few minutes. The ink was barely dry on her lease for the offices and she knew she definitely wanted to run her own firm. She’d heard of portfolio careers – but it was unlikely the term was designed to cover being an international rap sensation and a conveyancing solicitor under the same umbrella. Yo! Yo! Sign da lease, innit?

The thought of Toby, Katie and even Hatty witnessing her final move first-hand made her even more nervous, but she steeled herself. After all, it wasn’t really any different from their watching it at home on TV. It just meant that she’d see their reaction there and then, rather than hearing about it later. Besides, she reassured herself, she couldn’t really see into the audience once the lights went up. She’d just pretend they were back in the church hall, rehearsing where nobody could look, no one could judge and there was no fallout no matter how badly it went.

At her side, Eezee Troupe were squatting, flexing, stretching and flipping their way through their warm-up.

‘Ready in two,’ said a stagehand, appearing by her side in the near-darkness.

Then Clare’s stomach gave the obligatory dip and roll as she heard the first notes of their short film intro being played. ‘I want to send a message to women out there,’ she heard her screen self saying, ‘that we all deserve to be seen and valued for who we are.’ The music turned up tempo and Dan appeared on screen. ‘I grew up on the wrong side of the streets …’ he said, ‘dropped out of school at fifteen. At eighteen, I met a man who changed my life …’

Clare tuned out, mentally rehearsing her lyrics for the last time.

‘Ladiees and gentlemen,’ said the slightly over-the-top voice-over bloke. ‘Performing for you live, iiiitttsssss Martha Beeeeee and the Eeezeeeee Troupe!’

And this was it. In three minutes, she reminded herself, it would all be over.

They walked onto the stage with the lights down, then, as the first beat of the music began to play, she felt her body move instinctively. She raised the mic and began:

‘I ain’t sayin’ I’m a rapper, but I speak the truth,

I’m spitting out these lyrics, gonna raise the roof.

Not looking for a fortune, and I don’t want your fame,

Just want people to know me, and remember my name.

The Eezee Troupe love dancin’, just look at them flip,

They don’t need me to front ’em, yo I’ll give you a tip.

Just watch out for these boys and their master moves,

They’re comin’ at ya, gonna get you in the groove.

I’m not just a performer, no, I work in the law,

But my rap is from the heart, yeah, just the same as before.

Take notice of your mother, your girlfriend and ya sister,

The world is for the taking, but not just for you, mister!

I wanted to be noticed, and just look my flow,

But I’ve got one more surprise before I take off and go.

My real name is Clare Bailey, just an ordinary girl,

I thought I’d try some rappin’, that I’d give it a whirl.

It started as a joke, but yo it started workin’,

You haven’t seen the last of me, the future’s uncertain.

A mum of two young people, and boss to a few,

I’m going to put my heart into whatever I do.

I’m bringing you my music, and I’m going to keep tryin’,

But I’ll work in law as well – man, you wait, I’ll