Less than Perfect by S. J. Evans (love letters to the dead txt) 📕

strong enough to keep her up. She hadn’t realized just how weary she really was until she stood up, and that’s when all of the aches and weakness shattered her body.
As they left the restroom, Rachel safely helping her out of it, Skye took one quick glance back. She regretted it the moment she saw herself, buried under Bryan, struggling, while he aggressively kissed her.
She suddenly didn’t believe that she was just as strong as she led on.
As Rachel and Skye came around the corner of the building, Skye tripped on a small stone and almost sent them both spiraling down to the ground.
But with Victor’s impeccably quick moves, he caught them both in an instant, his hands gently holding them upright by separate shoulders.
“Are you two okay?” He asked, glancing back and forth between the two.
They both nodded. Rachel smiled wide as she curled herself into his arms more. “Thanks, Vic.” She said around a smile.
Skye tried to smile, but the truth was, she couldn’t stand being that close to him. She already didn’t like him very well, and then with everything that happened between her and Bryan, she couldn’t stand being near him. Victor wasn’t who she wanted to be near her, if anyone, Jules was.
“Yeah…err…thanks…” she murmured, trying to steady herself. Her heart was pounding, her legs shaking, her head throbbing, and her body numbing, but she didn’t let that keep her in his hands. Stepping back a little, she wobbled, trying to steady herself.
He quickly slid his glance over to her, staring back at her shaky form. “No problem,” he said. “Are you sure you’re alright, though?” He looked at her with a sort of genuine concern, but she didn’t want to buy into it.
“Yeah, I’m alright.” She breathed, catching her breath and balance. “I think I’m just a little tired, worn out.” She shrugged her frail shoulders and faked a smile, shifting her gaze past Victor. She had to see Jules. She needed to confirm that there was still something between them, even though he now knows part of what’s been up with her.
Victor grinned for a moment, quickly replacing his grin with a subtle tip of the lips, and straightened himself, wrapping his arm around Rachel as he cleared the way towards Jules who was standing a few feet away, leaning against a post.
Her breath caught in her throat as she stared at him, his tan skin, the bright green eyes accenting his face, the disheveled golden hair atop his head, and that charming half-smile creating butterflies in her stomach. She sighed, thoughts of Bryan’s threat drifting to the surface of her mind, and started walking towards him, her stomach turning.
What did he do to deserve the secret threats he earned? He hadn’t done anything wrong to her; yet, things were suddenly taking a turn for the worse and she was confused. She was going to have to try getting Bryan away, alone, and she feared that it could go wrong in a split second, just as before. She never imagined her feelings swaying in so many different directions all at once. Nor did she ever think that Bryan would turn on her, threatening the one person who seemed to really believe in her.
Taking enough steps to meet him, she took a deep breath, watching him carefully as he straightened himself and his face changed to expressing worry—as if he feared that she couldn’t handle being near him. No, Jules

, she wanted to say. Don’t worry about me. Don’t be so careful around me, you’re the one person I need right now. You’re the only one I want to understand me right now.

She stayed quiet for a moment, her stomach swarming with butterflies, her body suddenly electrified with a flaming desire, and her mind reeling with things she could say to him. Her hands shook at her sides and she had to grab onto another post nearby just to steady herself.
It only made Jules more concerned but he didn’t say it. “Hey,” he said, instead of the question she was tired of hearing.
“Hey,” she breathed. Looking into those stunning emerald eyes, she actually found herself smiling. “Um, thanks for coming to my rescue back there. Things just got a little…”
“Out of hand?” He finished.
“Yeah, I guess that’s the way to put it.” She added, awkwardly looking away, searching for an easy escape. She glanced at Victor and Rachel but they were already talking together, laughing and messing around. Taking a breath, she looked back at Jules, prepared to tell him all about Bryan, but he stopped her; his lips gently connecting with hers.
At first, she wanted to push him away from the impact of someone’s lips on hers so soon after Bryan’s, feeling uncomfortable and scared; but when his arms carefully wrapped around her, she grabbed onto his shirt to steady herself and realized how she

was kissing him

back.
The caress of his lips against hers was so gentle, so safe, that it almost brought tears to her eyes, forcing her to realize just how wrong Bryan was for her. As they kissed, she felt her body tingling, her weak body suddenly grasping onto an unknown energy that sparked her feelings. She didn’t care about anything else in that moment, only the feel of Jules’ protective arms around her.
She could feel his fear that he had done the wrong thing as he pulled away, slowly. “I’m sorry,” he said the moment his lips were free. “I don’t know what I was thinking, I shouldn’t have done that.” He mumbled, turning away from her.
She had never seen him so frantic and tense than in that moment, his hands going rigid at his sides as he paced away from her. She hated seeing him that way.
Standing there, catching her breath, she stared after him, waiting for a time to tell him that she really didn’t mind it. The kiss surprised her and scared her at first, but when she let herself take in those tender and perfect lips that didn’t belong to Bryan, she felt a strange safety about it all. She remembered that he wasn’t trying to hurt her.
“Jules,” she whispered. “It’s okay, really. Don’t—don’t put yourself down, I’m fine.” She was desperately quiet, the words slowly pouring from her mouth.
He turned around, peering at her behind the hair in his eyes, and made a face. “Are you sure? Skye, I shouldn’t have touched you so soon. I know I shouldn’t.” He said. His voice was low, slightly above a whisper, as he neared her, looking to see if anyone was watching them.
She shook her head, shrugging. “I’m sure, Jules. It wasn’t too soon or anything, I—I just don’t know if we should be doing this.” She sighed.
He stopped, confused. “Doing what?”
She looked around, grimacing and biting her lip as she thought of an answer. She hadn’t expected those words to spill from her mouth. “You know,” she gestured between the two of them, “this

. Us

. I don’t think that I can really handle all that’s been going on between us, it’s just too confusing.” She shivered, despite the blazing sun burning down on her back.
He looked genuinely surprised. “You’re not making any sense, Skye. What are you trying to say?”
She considered it, wondering what she really was saying, as tears threatened to cascade down her cheeks. “You have to forget about me. We shouldn’t be friends, Jules.” She had to use every last nerve of her just to say those words. Separating herself from Jules wasn’t what she wanted, that was what Bryan wanted. She didn’t want to forget about Jules or their kisses, or anything they had together. But, for the sake of a better illusion for Bryan, she had to make it seem as though she could forget about Jules. She felt the need to protect him.
“Forget about you? Skye, you don’t really want this. You don’t really believe that we shouldn’t be friends, do you?”
“I do, Jules.” She said, so clearly it seemed as though she was telling the truth, when she was so deeply lying to him. “Being friends just doesn’t seem easy enough, not now. You have to forget about me. I’ll forget about you too, we’ll never hurt each other, ever. I can’t be your ‘special’ friend anymore, Jules. So please, just take me home and forget you ever knew me, really. Don’t call, don’t come see me, just forget I was ever a part of your life.” She gulped air, finishing with foreign words that welled up tears in her eyes and shattered her already tattered heart. She could barely breathe, looking at Jules’ stricken and hurt face, praying that he would somehow see through the mask she put on to make the scene.
“Skye, are you serious? How can you be talking like this? You know that if we tried that it would be all lies, you know there’s something more between us. I know you see that.” His voice was louder this time, defense and sorrow subtly protruding.
Skye glanced over to make sure that Rachel and Victor weren’t listening when she realized they were nowhere around. Without even realizing it, she had gotten a text from Rachel saying that they were heading out.
“Jules, please stop. I can’t explain this any more than I already have. You’ve just got to forget about me for now. We wouldn’t be living in a lie, Jules. ‘Cause— well because I don’t feel anything more towards you. So please just take me home,” she pleaded, weariness clouding her again. She was so surprised by her words, so torn up, she hardly seemed to breathe.
“Skye…” He started, his bold eyes searching for answers.
“Please

.”
Sighing, he nodded his head and gestured towards the parking lot. “Okay, Skye. I’ll take you home.”
She wanted him to promise her that he would stay away from her, that he would forget about her; but there was still a part of her that couldn’t live without him and didn’t want to press it any further. That part that knew there was something more between them but was only trying to protect him. And she knew she had gotten the picture across enough to keep him away from her and Bryan away from him, as much as it broke her heart.
“Thank you,” she whispered. She stepped into pace beside him, holding her arms across her chest protectively. “I’m sorry.” She murmured, quiet enough so she knew he couldn’t hear her.
He kept his eyes focused straight ahead, dark circles shadowing underneath them.
When she looked up and saw his fallen spirit, she couldn’t help but hope that her plan works and he’ll someday understand why she did it. A day when she’s safe, they’re both safe, from Bryan. Her heart dropped to the pit of her stomach when she imagined Jules’ fallen feelings.
As Jules drove Skye home, the car was frighteningly silent. Neither had spoken a word since Skye thanked him, and the there was a sudden unknown and saddening tension between them.