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you want for her?”

“Happiness. I wish for her to be happy.”

“I’ll do my best. I can’t guarantee that she will be, but I promise I will try to make her the happiest woman in the world.” All of us almost laugh at Griffin’s expression, full of intensity and fervor.

“If you can make her happy, by all means… do it,” I choke softly, my face twisted with hidden mirth. He glares at me, obviously noticing our barely-hidden chuckles.

Mona? Happy? What a joke. It’s impossible. She isn’t exactly easy to please, to say the least.

“Well,” he looks at his watch awkwardly, “Looks like I’m needed in a few minutes in the meeting room. I’ll come back later and tell you the verdict. They are trying to decide what their final proposition to Mona will be.”

I watch him start to walk away with a resignation that shocks me. Everything he said makes perfect sense. There is really no point in trying to save Mona.

Griffin stops for a second, and then swivels around to face me. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, then quickly retreats up the narrow stairs at the end of the hallway.

Why did things have to end up like this? Now even a cowardly crossbreed is feeling… pity towards me. I feel like the lowest of werewolves—a criminal. Now that my fighting spirit has been sucked away, nothing is left except a big, gaping hole in my heart.

“Hey, I finished another hole!” Ray shouts, showing us proudly the new dot he had made. I shake my head in dismay.

“Xavier, what are you going to do?” Jake asks me in low tones, the serious one of the bunch. He calmly takes in my misshapen appearance as a tear starts to fall slowly from my eye. Embarrassed, I brush it away.

“I don’t know, Jake. I just don’t know anymore.”

“Mona seems to be getting along pretty well with Griffin,” Ray comments obnoxiously. The others start to glare at him but he doesn’t notice, delirious from the long hours in a dark cell. “She seems like she will be fine here.”

“Seems so.” I reluctantly admit, though anger is building within me. Ray is really getting on my nerves today. He always knows the best ways in which to annoy me.

“He seems to act like a real mate. Someone who is responsible and caring. I think you can rest easy, Xavier.”

“And I wasn’t?!” I exclaim, starting to shift into my wolf form. Wes and Jake start to laugh, for reasons unknown. This has happened so many times today.

“Uh… do I have to answer that?”

I pounce on him mid-shift, biting his ear and clawing his fur. He yowls in pain as I start to draw blood. We growl at each other as he rips away and completes the shift, now a wolf that is larger than I.

The fight continues for several minutes, mostly consisting of risky moves and stupid decisions. I knew I shouldn’t have gone for his tail, and I did it anyway, leaving my back open for attack. I really need to brush up on fighting tactics in this form.

“Guys…” A familiar voice interrupts our tussle, and we instantly stop. A slinky form materializes outside of the cell, leaning against the back wall.

“Yi!” we basically shout in unison. He looks around anxiously then turns back to us with one finger on his lips.

“I’m here to bust you guys out of this cell. Danae’s posing as one of the maids here at headquarters but it won’t last for long. She is getting so many wrinkles that she needs a trip to the laundromat.”

“Where have you been?” I ask him, completely shifted back to human form. He smiles and winks.

“They never captured me at the mansion. Seems that they forgot I even belonged to the pack. Funny how much a Stealth talent can manage, huh?”

“How did you get in here?” Jake queries.

“The front door,” he winks, “It is the greatest experience, walking around and not even having one cute girl wink at me. So liberating.”

“I still don’t get how you did it. That’s impossible. They must have noticed you.”

“Details, details. We will get to them later.” Yi yawns, and then pulls out a slender key. “I got this from the red-head that just left.”

“Griffin? So you have been in here the whole time?” I ask in annoyance, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“How much fun would that be? And it’s only been a few minutes. He walked out, I walked in. And he had his key dangling from his belt loop as if he wanted it to be stolen. I could have sworn I saw him grin on the way out.”

That sly dog—quite literally. I can’t help but like him now, no matter how aggravated I am at my present situation.

“So like Jake asked, what are you going to do?” Yi asks me slowly. “Are you going to stay here and try to save Mona? Or are you going to leave with the rest of us?”

“Wait. All of you are going to leave?” I turn and look at the other pack members. They all make weird expressions that I can’t possibly decipher.

“We want to support you Xavier. But we all think it is a lost cause… a lost cause that is going to get us all killed. Griffin explained the situation pretty well.” Jake explains. He looks guilty… as he should.

“I just can’t,” I whisper, “I can’t give up on her.”

I remain silent while Yi glides over to the door, placing a key in the lock. There is a click as it turns, and the bars are finally open. I am finally free.

“You have a choice. You can either come with us now, or you can stay here and fight for her. But I promise you… if we leave, we are not coming back. This is your one and only chance.”

Everyone stands and starts to exit the cell. Yi, however, comes in and sits by me on the wooden bench. He tries his best to look comforting, and fails miserably.

“I saw Mona in her room. She looked happy. I really do hate this for you, Xavier, but we will help in any way we can. If you truly want to fight, I’m sure we can convince the others to try.”

I am barely listening to Yi, immersed in a tidal wave of memories; Mona’s smiling face after I saved her in the forest, her adorable expression of annoyance that I had come to know so well… her look of pure elation after the first kiss we shared. I can’t bear this. I can’t lose her.

Mona grins at me as I give her steak. She yells at me in indignation after I kiss her cheek. And somewhere, in the back of my mind, she sleeps in Rays arms, soaking wet in a large fountain.

That’s right… I almost forgot about that incident. I was so keen on getting her back, so eager to get on her good side that the reason why I got mad at her slipped my mind. Even though I am not mad at her in the slightest now, the main message hits me like one of Ray’s punches in the stomach.

She doesn’t need you. She doesn’t need you like you need her.

This is the final straw. I sever the last remaining bond with my emotions and stand up like a robot. I have no hard feelings towards her, but I have to let her go.

She was never mine to begin with.

No wonder she never felt the attachment I did. No wonder she never loved me in return. Even though Griffin said otherwise.

She was never mine.

The last tear I plan on shedding in a long time escapes my eye as I firmly take the first step outside of the cell door. It is over… forever.

I only wish I could say good bye.

 

~ Mona ~

 

I stare at Griffin in disbelief. “What?”

“He’s gone. He disappeared from his cell a few days ago. We have been trying to find him and the rest of his pack, but they are nowhere to be found. Yi, your friend, is a very clever Stealth talent. He must have helped them escape.” He sees my tears before they start to fall and pulls me close. “I’m sorry Mona. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this. You don’t deserve it.”

“I wanted to talk to him.” I say, still frozen by the news Griffin delivered. “I wanted to see him again.”

“I know you did.” He squeezes me tight, though careful to avoid touching my skin. The true impact of his words seems to hit me at this moment.

He left me.

He abandoned me.

Pain blossoms in my chest, swallowing me entirely. Am I even a person anymore? What am I? All I can see is pain… hurt, sorrow, and betrayal.

I should have run after him when he tried to leave last week. I should have held on to him and never let him go. And now he’s... gone. Leaving me with this awful disease that makes me feel such desire.

I am choking from lack of air, for it feels like he has taken away my willingness to breathe along with my heart. It is strange to think—that he has stolen my heart—but in this state of insanity it is easier to believe.

All I really know right now is that I need him, for reasons that are unclear. I need him like no one else I have ever met before.

I hate this feeling of dependence, but it overtakes my body until it is impossible to deny. And now I can never see him again... feel his warm lips, or hear his musical laugh. I miss it all, every single obnoxious, insolent part of him that makes him so special.

This pain.

“Please help me,” I start to sob, hanging onto Griffin like I am never going to let go. I accidentally make contact with his skin, and the pain causes me to rip apart from him. I stumble across the floor, holding my arm where I had touched Griffin. A large red mark stretches across it.

I can’t deal with this anymore.

I try to wait until the pain subsides, wait until I gain some semblance of sanity. “I will do it.” I choke, softly spitting out the cursed words. How I wish I didn’t have to say them… but I must escape.

“Do what?” Griffin gently asks, his voice full of concern. It seems to be the tone of voice he always uses with me lately.

“Anything. Anything that gets rid of the pain. Sharuken, I think they called it.”

“Mona, are you sure?”

I lean on the stone wall, not quite sure what is happening. I think the Council has gathered around me from the sound of the heavy cloaks that are swishing across the floor. I know this is it. I can’t take my words back.

I think of Xavier, of the happy times we experienced together. Of the joyous feelings in my heart that I have anxiously tried to suppress. It all means so much to me. I don’t want to lose it.

But, I don’t want to experience this. Nothing amounts to the anguish of having a heart ripped apart and left in pieces. I… don’t want to be hurt in this manner. I must become stronger.

“Yes.”

 

One's Dream, Another's Nightmare

 

I

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