Less than Perfect by S. J. Evans (love letters to the dead txt) 📕

Leah and Johnny get home safely?” he cut in. “Yes. I’ll stay.”
She smiled, tears of gratitude welling in her eyes. “Thank you,” she cried into his chest. No tears were shed; it was but a cry of gratitude and happiness. She couldn’t have asked for anything more.
“I want to,” he told her. “I want to be here with you, Skye. You have to know that I don’t want to leave you a lot. You’re incredibly important to me now. You always have been.” His voice carried passed her ears in a beautiful melody. His words were music to her ears. They relaxed her already peaceful body.
“I know, Jules,” she added. “I know.”
“Here,” he directed, peeling her away from him so that he could look into her eyes. “Let me make us some breakfast.”
She gave him a look of disbelief. “You cook?”
“Yes, Ma’am.” He grinned, playing with the ends of her hair as she stared back at him with a bright smile.
Chuckling, she shook her head slowly, playing with the fabric of his shirt. “I don’t believe you.”
“You’d be amazed by how much I could surprise you,” he said, hot breath bathing her face. In one quick movement, he pulled Skye into him, spun them both around so that his body was above hers, and pinned her underneath him, hands on either side of her shoulders. She lay below him, giggling and breathing heavy. A smirk spread across his face as he leaned into her, brushed his lips over hers, and whispered in her ear, “See? I’m full of surprises.”
She smiled at the man above her, disregarding any dark memories and replacing them with a clean sheet of anticipation. It felt right with Jules. She knew he wouldn’t take things further than she wanted. No matter how many times he’d insisted that he could hurt her before, she knew he wouldn’t. He was too gentle, too kind. He was more of an angel than a monster. He was nowhere near the standing point Bryan had once been in, nor was he even close to where Johnny was. He was better than that.
“I guess you are,” she breathed. Her heart was pounding against her chest, her pulse thumping in her ears. Laughter trembled from her lips, soft sounds of a happy melody. She was finally experiencing pure joy that she’d always wanted—she was finally happy again. As she stared into Jules’s emeralds, she couldn’t contain the butterflies that fluttered in her stomach and throughout her body. He gave her an incredible feeling she’d never truly felt before from another man. Not even entirely with Bryan.
He gave her the true and tender feeling of love.
“What are you thinking about, trouble?” he asked, taking one of his hands and brushing his thumb over her cheekbone. “Me?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
Instantly, blushes heated her cold face and she had to fight just to keep her mouth closed. She wanted to gape at him, flabbergasted that he figured her out. Was it that obvious that she was thinking about him? Must’ve been.
Hastily, she shook her head and laughed abruptly, playing innocent. “No, of course not,” she breathed, still catching her breath from surprise. She knew she was a terrible liar when caught red-handed.
He chuckled, removing his hand from her face, his gaze having rolled right over her pinkish-red cheeks. “Admit it, Skye. You were thinking about me,” he said. “You were thinking about us.” Enchanting chills spread up her arms as he resituated himself a little, trailing his fingers against her arms and up. He searched her face for what seemed to be some sort of expression for him to stop, but when he realized she was smiling, watching him, he didn’t hesitate. Gently, he kissed her, traveled down, and lingered on her neck.
Skye moaned, biting down her squeals. She couldn’t decipher whether or not they were squeals of pure bliss or squeals of desire, all she knew was they were aching to get out. Going against everything her buried fear told her, she pulled his head up and kissed him, aggressively. His taste collided with her mouth, still unbelievably minty and clean under the circumstances. She felt his surprise in the way he kissed her, so much more subtle than hers. She twirled her fingers in the shagginess of his hair in disarray, gripping it almost for more support.
Jules, his hands supporting him on the mattress, kissed her back. He was still careful; checking a few times to make sure it was okay to go on. She wouldn’t have had it any other way though. She wanted to be close to him, to hold him and make sure he was not only real, but he was hers. She was hungry for those sorts of closure.
Eventually pulling away, chest heaving, eyes wide from their passion, he tried catching his breath. His eyes lingered above Skye a few moments before returning to her eyes, reaching into her heart and soul. He was taking long, deep breaths as he regarded her with an expression of contentment.
Skye shook her head and brought him closer to her again, trailing her hands down the front of his shirt. She started lifting it off when he sat up, grabbed onto one of her hands and stopped her, kissing her knuckles.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” he cautioned. “I’d never want you to do something like this if you weren’t ready. In fact, we can even slow down a bit. We should probably take our time, not rush things.”
She shook her head vigorously, touching his face with her free hand. “I want to be with you, Jules. I’m not scared of you.” Her voice barely went above a whisper, her breath still catching up with her.
“Maybe you should be a little more scared of me, Skye,” he whispered, squeezing her hand. “I could hurt you, somehow, somewhere, and then you’d wish you had never trusted me. Look, I’m not saying that you can’t trust me or that you should be scared of me; but we should slow down a little. I’d never want you to be pressured into anything you’re not ready for.”
She thought about it for a moment, her mind swimming with reasons for why he kept telling her he could hurt her. She knew he could hurt her, but the difference was that she knew he wouldn’t. She wanted to turn things around, scream at him that she was ready; but when she looked deep into his pleading eyes, she noticed something she hadn’t before. She noticed how much he knew her. He almost knew her better than she knew herself. And she wanted the feeling to be mutual. But she knew that she barely knew anything about him. Just the thought shook her away from giving everything to him. She’d already given him her heart. That was all she needed to for the time being.
“You’re right,” she whispered. “I—I just got carried away. I just don’t want to lose you.”
He smiled, bringing her hand to his lips and kissing her knuckles again. “You’ll never lose me, Skye,” he murmured against her hand. His body shook a little as he rolled off of her, Skye noticed. From what though, wasn’t clear. He sighed beside her, his shoulder touching hers. “I’ll be with you as long as I’m living.”
Her heart slammed against her chest, her breathing faltered, her mind spun in circles. Never? She gasped internally. As long as he’s living?

She wondered if he really meant it or not, but didn’t question it aloud. She didn’t want to doubt him. She wanted to believe that he was being completely honest with her. That’s all she wanted.
“Jules,” she spoke, quietly, “don’t make promises you can’t keep.” She hated the words. She felt they tasted bitter and wrong. But they had to be set free, unleashed. She had to know he wasn’t toying with her like every other guy had once done to her. Although, every fragment of her heart told her he was better than that. He was different

.
“I’m not,” was all he said before he moved onto his side and kissed her cheek. “I’ll never leave you, Skye. And that is a promise I’ll always keep.” His voice was only slightly above a whisper as he brought her face around to look at him and spoke words that warmed Skye’s entire body with an energy that took her breath away. “I love you, Skye. I always have, always will.”
What was this always? He couldn’t have fallen in love with her the first time he met her, could he? Skye didn’t know what to think, how to react—she was still trying to process everything. He’d made a commitment, a promise, followed by words she’d always wanted to hear and be able to truly believe. She’d found herself someone to love.
Doing the only thing she figured she could do, Skye kissed him, and whispered into his ears something she was aching to admit. “I love you too, Jules. I love you with everything I have.”
And with that, Jules caught her hand in hers and pulled her on top of him, watching her intently. They never lost eye contact, so wrapped up in the beauty of their confessions and feelings that nothing else around them mattered.
They lay there, Skye above Jules, leaning against him as he stroked her hair, in silence. Everything they could say didn’t need to be said. The quiet beating of their hearts was the only melody.


Rain pattered against the ground, mud and grass mixed thoroughly into sludge. The sky was gray and foggy, the summer air humid and stuffy. Wind blew through the porch, whistling passed Skye and Jules’s ears. They sat, cuddled up together, on the wooden swing hanging down from the roof of the porch. They had finished their late breakfast, freshened up, and shared many conversations with each other, sharing small things about themselves.
Silence crossed paths between them, each of them speaking in the significant action of merely being together. Neither spoke; only in their hearts did they communicate. For a few long moments, that was.
“They’ll be back soon, you know,” Skye murmured, breaking the silence. She was gazing out at the road, part of her mind somewhere far away in her own little world. Although everything seemed right with Jules, next to her, keeping her safe and happy, she started to fear the near future. She started to fear seeing her mother again, seeing Johnny again, seeing them together again. And she hated it. Leah didn’t deserve to be feared by her own daughter; she had done nothing wrong.
But she didn’t fear Leah

. She feared the idea of Leah having Johnny’s baby. She feared what would happen if that monster had his own child. She couldn’t stand thinking about what he would do to it or how he would treat it. Everything he would do, she imagined, would all be wrong for the baby. Someone as heartless as Johnny wouldn’t be able to take proper care of a child.
He certainly had never done a swell job handling Skye.