A Howl In The Night by Lorelei Sutton (life books to read .txt) 📕

world, different from my past recollections and present emotions. It’s a hard thing for me to describe, quite honestly, because I can’t even begin to understand it myself. In this case, the word “different”must take on a myriad of implications and interpretations to reflect the chaos erupting within my own heart. I feel hatred, yet I feel an undeniable attraction. I want to slap his face and stroke his cheek. But for the other people I have encountered here…nothing fazes me.

I think what I am so afraid of may be the intensity of my feelings. Regardless of what they are, they exist, and they are presented in a way that is near impossible to ignore. There is strange beauty in this new revelation—that I can feel, and do so strongly—but also great terror as I witness the control it holds over my body. I almost…want to be subjected to the pretty boy’s reign of terror. It gives me shivers to imagine sleeping next to him again, to see his smooth skin and irritating, perfect face. Which is exactly why I must escape, and do it quickly.

I must keep all of this shame and emotion locked within my body, because what I truly need is strength, not weakness, in such an empty land. Weakness invites trouble, and I can’t take any more of that, especially if it comes in the form of a blue-haired werewolf.

The biggest problem here is that it just seems like I can’t escape, no matter how hard I try.

Large hands wrap around my waist, and I lose my balance, falling towards the rough ground. I am immediately enveloped in an embrace, the warmth spreading throughout my entire body. Everything happening in an instant, the only thing I truly notice is the sickly sweet aroma surrounding me, almost pungent in strength.

And then it’s over, and strangely I feel none of the impact of the collision. My personal pillow, whether he or she meant to be one or not, has saved me. But he or she also provoked me to trip anyways, so I don’t feel sorry at all.

The familiarity in my savior’s gesture reminds me of Xavier, as well as the feel of his hands on the small of my back. I look up, fully expecting to see his face, but nearly jump ten feet away in the surprise that Ray is in front of me instead.

“Wha…what…”My voice cracks and stumbles, coming out in an embarrassing stutter.

“Nice to see you again,”he comments, a smirk on the corner of his features. “So, you survived the night with the monster?”His eyes crinkle as he laughs, twisting around as he does so. Now I am on the ground, with him on his hands and knees above me.

“Barely,”I mutter, scrambling to my knees and away from Ray, who is casually standing up and grinning annoyingly at the same time. When he smiles like this, he almost looks like his brother…and it just makes me want to keep running.

“Where are you going?”he asks as he sees me backing away, trying to be conspicuous but obviously not enough to fool him. “The group’s in that direction.”He points to the west, which is definitely not where I am headed.

“Uh, I wanted to head down to the river and take a bath.”I make my excuse quickly, and his eyes narrow in response.

“There is no river around here. There’s a pond, where the group is.”He smiles, but in a slightly more menacing way that chills me to the bone. “So why don’t you follow me over there and we can grab some food. You must be hungry.”

My stomach grumbles, making me wince. Maybe it would be better to stick with the group, as long as I can somehow prevent myself from seeing him. If not anything else, I could still grab a bite to eat from wherever they’re getting it.

He reaches out and grabs my arm, his grip like iron. It is then that I hear the crackling of branches and the pounding of feet. I start to squirm in Ray’s hold, fear taking hold of my heart.

“Mona?”A frenzied call echoes throughout the forest as Xavier races into the clearing, his breathing heavy and erratic. His eyes first land on me, and then slide down to our linked arms. He then surveys Ray, probably trying to put everything together. His face clouds over, and his eyes return to meet my own. I instantly look away, blushing furiously and cursing myself for doing it. “Were you…”

“Bringing her back to camp? Yes.”Ray jumps in, supposedly saving Xavier from making false assumptions. Although I don’t know why I even care if he makes them or not. “She was looking for a bath and I was trying to help her get to the pond near here.”

“Oh…”Xavier blushes, looking downwards and then up towards me, “so that’s why…”

I guess this is better than nothing. It would be bothersome if he thought Ray and I were doing anything.

I slap myself mentally and once again…wonder why I care.

We start walking in complete silence, the awkwardness stretching between us. I don’t look at the others, staring straight ahead and trying to wipe my mind of all stupid thoughts. There are many swirling around in my head, seeking to distract me from the matter at hand.

What now? I don’t have many options, and Ray has just eliminated the stupidest one of them. Running away is just not a possibility when my companions are so much stronger than I am. And it also seems like running doesn’t bring me farther away from my problems in this world, but only draws me closer to them.

“Ray, why did you know where I was?”I ask him in a clipped tone, my feet crunching on the dead grass. I try to keep my voice unwavering, betraying none of the uncertainty within me. “If the camp is way over there, then…”

“Oh, I was just trying to find some more fruit. It seems like these plants only grow near water, though, so I found nothing. Well, except for you.”Ray walks a little faster to match my pace, and I can see the amusement in his eyes as he regards the two of us. I want to change my stiff expression, for I know he is going to think that something has happened, but somehow I just can’t make myself look indifferent. “Had an argument, huh?”He asks teasingly, just as I guessed he would.

I sneak a glance over to the side, watching Xavier’s expression in response to Ray’s words. He looks confused, his face tilted in embarrassment. I feel a little guilty for a moment, and then snap out of my contemplative stupor. It seems like I’m doing that a lot around him lately, and I don’t like it.

My footsteps quicken as I hear growing voices from the clearing. Ray dances in front of me, speeding up even more, and twists around so that he is not even looking where he is going but is staring back at the two of us. A mocking grin is on his features, annoying me to no end. “Aren’t you two going to kiss and make up before we reach the others? Can’t have any hostility in the camp.”He teasingly twists his hands into the shape of a heart and makes a kissing noise with his lips. My hands clench in anger.

“Mona…”Xavier’s low voice murmurs cautiously beside me as a spirit spear begins to materialize in my hand. “What are you doing?”

I take deep breaths as I look downwards, surprised at the weapon I had created. The sharp edges slowly dissipate into fine particles, blown away by the wisps of the wind as I concentrate on controlling my anger.

That’s really weird. Usually my spear doesn’t appear unless I’m at least focused on it. I wonder if the decreasing lack of control I am having over my fury has anything to do with it.

When I look up, eyes wide, I see Ray’s own eyes locked onto my clenched palm with an unfamiliar expression on his face. I can’t quite decipher his emotions from that one expression, and I usually pride myself on my ability to do so.

“Are you okay, Mona?”Xavier asks me gently, his hand touching my arm. He has gotten so much closer over the last few seconds, sending my brain into an emotional overload.

“I’m fine. Sorry. I don’t know what came over me,”I say quietly, causing him to step back at the iron laced within my response. I am determined to treat him normally, like any other person. I will not trifle with silly emotions I am not destined to feel.

I look up—my mistake—to see a pair of eyes, glittering with golden flecks within a green meadow that continues endlessly throughout the horizon. They are as dark as the night, yet shine with the brightness of a perfectly cut jewel. They push you away, almost forbidding in their abnormality, yet somehow you get tugged towards them anyways, pulled in by the mysteries of their vast depths.

I lose the lucidity of free thought for a few seconds, and then furiously snap my face away. My cheeks burning in embarrassment, I try to shut out all noises, all of Ray’s stupid reactions, and most importantly, Xavier.

I walk through the bushes quickly to reach the clearing, leaving the rest behind, and at the center is a decently sized pond. I almost scream as a figure starts to get out of the pond, heading for his clothes on the rock.

I feel people around me as I instantly twist around and put my hands over my head. “What’s wrong, Mona?”Ray whispers close to my ear, completely back to normal.

“M-m-man…”I stammer. “N-naked…”My eyes still stay tightly shut.

“Oh.”Ray sounds nonchalant. “Haven’t you ever seen a naked man before?”

“Ray... shut up,”I whine, “tell me when he has clothes on.”There is something about this awareness that shouldn’t faze me, but it does anyways. I don’t get why I’m so adverse to things that are so silly and reflect my innocence.

“Yi!”He shouts, “Put your clothes on!”There is silence for a moment, and then I feel a rough tapping on my head. “He’s done, princess.”

“Don’t call me princess.”I punch him in the arm after raising my head, scowling at the smirk on his face. He grabs my arm, bringing it through his own with such force that I can hardly resist.

“Let me escort you, princess,”He says, unperturbed. His eyes are scanning the area, but then return to mine as quickly as they left. “Mona, I’m teasing.”Ray’s tone seems slightly more apologetic now, though still twisted with laughter. “Don’t be offended.”

I want to smack him so badly on his pompous, arrogant face.

We start walking towards the pond, I furiously tugging on my captured hand, he grinning smugly as if the expression has been plastered onto his features. He keeps my hand securely locked within his hold, and I am unable to do anything against him. I look behind me, and Xavier is meandering a few paces behind me. He is looking down, but with my glance his gaze travels upwards to meet mine again. A strange panic floods over me and I quickly turn to face Ray. A strange, incomprehensible look was on Xavier’s face, and for some reason the expression made me feel undeniably guilty.

“Sorry, Mona. I wasn’t thinking,”Yi calls, now wearing torn and dirty pants. He uses his t-shirt to dry off his body. I try not to look at his glistening skin.

“No problem,”I mumble, feeling embarrassed. I don’t even know where to look anymore, and my eyes roam across the clearing. A small area catches my eye, and I see the tiny fruits peppered among several bushes near the water. “Is that where you guys got the fruit?”I ask, distracted by the prospect of getting food.

“Yeah, those are the only living bushes we have found around here,”Yi says contemplatively, “seems like they only grow around water sources.”

“Yeah, Ray said something about that. I wonder if these are plants that are just drawn to water, or if